Life as a single mom

I am feeling a little defeated. In February of this year, only 8 mos after I was hired,   I was let go from my job in Charleston, SC. (Why only 8 mos? That is for another blog!) At that time, I decided to move back in with my parents. I immediately began sending out hundreds of resumes in Charleston, Columbia and even a few in Georgia. Realizing that my resumes were basically “cold”, I decided then that I needed to be back in Phoenix. My professional and personal circles expand much farther here. On June 1 the cross-country adventure began. I streamlined my belongings, AGAIN, left some in SC but donated much of it to a charity in Charleston. With my PT Cruiser and a small tow-behind Uhaul trailer Tanner, a friend of mine and I made a 2.5 day haul from east coast to west coast. Before relocating to AZ I did send out many resumes to organizations that had openings here in Phx. I also “sounded the alarm” to many friends and peers to let them know I was heading back to AZ and lo...

I would tell my mom that I loved her more than she loved me. In fact, our dialogue went a lot like this: Mom: Have a good day, Jarrett and remember, I love you. Me: Thanks, but I love you more Mom: Not possible! Me: Yes! I know I have more love and understanding for you than you for me. Now, our dialogue goes more like this: Mom: I love you, Jarrett Me: I love you too, Mom. Mom: I love you more than you love me. Me: Yup! You do! A Mother's Love is so strong; I know that now as I look at my son and think how very much I love him and am grateful to have him graciously enter my life. He makes my world better every day!

I could write a book about dating. It seems every attempt has been a BUST! I met a guy for coffee...he never offered to buy me any coffee so we just sat there and chatted. I WANTED COFFEE! I met a guy (never in person) and he tells me he is a cross dresser. Ummm....NO THANKS! I met a guy who ends up texting me. I google searched his # and realized he was married, works a high profile government job and was "interviewing" me for him and his wife. Also, NO THANKS! I got an email from a guy who had the profile name of 'irishangryman'. RED FLAG already in his screen name. For those of you who are married - enjoy the ups and downs but there are far more downs in dating that I could imagine in a marriage. I am still "on the market" as some would say and am learning more and more about me and what I want. I have also learned to "interview" the other person to see if they are even worthy of me and my son, have goals and desires in life and are not...

I am still questioning this greater being. I am not saying that I DO NOT believe (mainly bc I fear going to hell) but I question it. I also question an overall Higher Power (HP). It is hard and people say…”if you question, look at your son” Still…I question. I do not intend for this to become a dialogue about religion or anyone pushing religion on me or anyone else who is reading this. I just need to say that I QUESTION…is that so bad? There is a beautiful world out there and I have traveled to many wonderful places, seen awe-inspiring sites and have met “angels” on this Earth. (Angels – people that do good for their community, themselves and others around them.) Growing up, I was raised Southern Baptist and Presbyterian (USA). I was baptized later (around my teenage years) but honestly, I started going to church because the church has a very vibrant youth group. All the “cool kids” were there and the church took fun retreats/outings. What kid wouldn’t want to be a part of tha...

Times have been hard for me but I am keepin' on, keepin' on. Here are some things that I am grateful for...in no particular order! 1. Friends and Family -  providing Tanner and me with roofs over our heads, fish in our bellies (sorry, a poor reference to Finding Nemo) and warm beds. Oh...and sometimes the use of their cars! 2. Securing project/contract work from time to time. That has definitely helped me through some of the more difficult moments. 3. Facebook  - yes, SAD, I know...but it is true. Facebook has allowed me to stay connected with ALL my wonderful friends regardless of geographic location. 4. Cell phone - another sad truth, but thankfully modern technology also keeps me connected to the great big world. 5. Zumbathons - yes, a latest craze of mine. (Thanks, Jennifer L and Vanessa P for introducing me to this) 6. Lieutenant landlords - I was lucky in both Charleston and now Phoenix to find understanding landlords who agreed to rent to me. YES...Tan...

At 14 mos of age and 8+ ear infections, we (myself and doctors) have decided to move forward with placing tubes in his ears. I am a little nervous about the anesthesia it requires but this procedure is the 2nd most common to circumcison. However, I was told that after this procedure he would still want to eat! The final decision was made after seeing the ENT and having a full hearing test done. Right now, Tanner is hearing as we would if we walked around with our fingers stuck in our ears (muffled). The tubes will help with drainage and releasing the fluid...therefore, allowing him to hear much better and it should help progress his overall speech. Tomorrow at 6:30 am our time (Arizona), we will be at Phoenix Children's Hospital. I am told the paperwork required for the procedure takes longer than the actual procedure. My friends who have done this same procedure for their children have given me nothing but great reviews. So, please...good vibes, thoughts and prayers our ...